A Little Bit Of Me...

It's a sunny day (I have no idea why that is relevant information but there you have it).

I have been looking over  my blog and I've noticed a terrible, terrible trend, one that has to be stopped this instant. That is, if I don't over think the issue, decide its a bad idea thereby totally abandoning it and have a tasty snack instead. I know it may be hard to believe after that bit of info but I'm not flaky.

Okkkay, just a little bit.

*Sigh*

Maybe more than a little bit.
(Why does this sound like a therapy session or a trip to my imaginary fairy godmother's house and an "acceptance is the first step" speech?)

Anyway... Back to the topic at hand- the terrible, terrible trend. I have been withholding ME from this blog, which I know a terrible, terrible crime and sort of defeats the purpose of having created this slice of cyberspace.

Let me explain.

I have a chronic illness called socially awkward girl/woman (I feel like I'm suck somewhere in between the two sometimes) syndrome (no good (?) disease is complete without that word). I'm that girl/woman who arrives at the party unfashionably early, does the equally offensive act of leaving just as early, drinks a soft drink the entire time (no, I'm not a goody-two-shoes, I simply can't stand alcohol), stands off to the side and feels mild panic at the thought of initiating a conversation with a stranger. Now I know some of you may be wondering, is she an alien? A mutant perhaps? Actually I'm not that put off at the thought of being a mutant, just as long as I'm not grossly disfigured with something like a third eye on my chin or eating human brains for breakfast (dinner, I might be cool with). I mean, who would not want some cool superpowers although the whole "with great power comes great responsibly" bit seems not all that fun. I'm scared of centipedes. How the heck would I face off with a super villain. That would only end one way and might I say humanity would be doomed.

And.... I'm rambling....

So the point I'm trying to get across is that I realized that I moved this pattern into my blogging and to a smaller extent into my writing as well (oh, the horror and that ain't a joke). I would not say that I'm (that) shy but the idea of being the center of attention leaves me with sweaty armpits and a stammer (you can't imagine the number of times I've imagined falling down on my face, literally and figuratively, while everyone is watching) and the idea of failure is nearly crippling. So I grown into not putting myself out there, therefore I am not judged and found wanting.

Well, its time to break these self-imposed shackles (oh, I like the image). Writing and being published has helped me take a step in the right direction but I want to build on that foundation and have decided to stop filtering my thoughts here on Nacomy's Romance Corner (what do you think of NRC for short? -I like it).

So until next time with more of Nacomy and not the soul-sucking, chocolate-stealing impostor who has been writing these posts!

Love Letter To Me

So….

I was bored and decided to do something instead of mope and stuff my face.

Therefore naturally there was a Google search involved! And I found an interesting suggestion- Writing a Love Letter to Myself.

I had never considered doing something like that but I figured why not? I have nothing better to do. So I present to you a love letter written to me by me.

Dear Fantastically Fabulous Me,

Let’s begin with the undeniable truth. I love you!!! Now and for always, you are my first and last love.

I realize that I may be a little hard on you sometimes but it’s only because you need that little kick in the butt to get moving once in a while. That being said, stop being so hard on yourself. Stop. Breathe. Take the day in because it just might pass you by.

When you’re feeling down, don’t fret. Hold your chin up, grit your teeth through the bull dished your way, smile at the hypocrites that try to stand in your way and don’t forget to say thank you to the ones that gave you a helping hand.

When you forget all the little things that make you special I’ll remind you. A phenomenal mom. The daughter and sister that went above and beyond. A respectful neighbor and friend. A lover that curls toes.

Even though you ate that entire bag of cookies in one go, you are still one hotttt mama!!! Every one of those life marks tell a story that encompasses the splendor that is you. And if anyone says different, give them the mental finger, put a little extra oomph in your hips and let them watch that beautiful ass as you walk away.

Life is full of trials and when you feel like shouting, “Why me?”, remember that the you you are today is a product of your past and you are pretty damn great!!!

Yours Truly,

Nacomy Blue.

Writing this made me realize that I take myself for granted sometimes. I think we all do sometimes. So I dedicate this post to celebrating what makes you and me special!

Don’t forget to comment. What makes you one of a kind?

'Til next time!

The Confusion that is Life

An innocent baby is born

With no knowledge of this cruel world

But she learns

She learns from a tender age

That, things do not come in easy packages

Food, education, clean water

Sleep

But….

She is strong

She learns to depend on herself

To take the heartache and forgive

That courage is not without fear

But fear conquered

That tears are not a weakness

But a cleansing of the soul

That success is not based on the salary you earn

But the appreciation that failure leads to knowledge

That strength is not sitting on the throne all alone

But knowing when to reach out a helping hand

This baby learns

She grows and matures

And realizes that in this chaos,

All that is left is choice,

The choice to live for material possession, fame, recognition and all the unimportant things we are now taught to crave

Or….

The choice to live for self-discovery and self-acceptance

To appreciate family, friends and even strangers

To bask in nature’s treasures

To realize in times of pain

That there is someone worse off

Who knows what she will choose

What anyone will choose

The one thing that is sure

Is that life is a journey of many roads

Some are smooth, others bumpy

Some carefree, others filled with worry

Some lead us to the things we want

Others lead us to the things we need

No matter where these roads take us

Know that life is never easy

However, the following tools are always a soothing balm

Strength of character

Sense of integrity and honor

Honesty

Compassion for your neighbor

And most importantly

Love for one another.

When my time comes

Another poem.

When my time comes

No matter how soon

Will my existence have made an impact?

A difference?

Will my actions today

Make you say, “Good Riddance.”

Or will tears of grieve accompany my departure from this earth?

When my time comes

Will I look back and think

“I wish I’d….”

Will my life had been filled with incomplete actions and words?

Would I have lives every day to the fullest?

Joyously; without reservation

With complete abandon

When my time comes

Would I have shown the ones that I love

The depth of my feelings?

My adoration?

Starting today

Every day will be an opportunity to say

“I love you”.

Starting today

To everyone who has wronged me

“I forgive you”.

Starting today

To everyone who has shown me an ounce of kindness

“Thank you”.

Starting today

My life is an example of a life truly lived

Not merely an existence

Starting today

Every breathe is a gift

And when my time comes

My last breath will be complemented by a smile.

Dreaming of a New World

Field of wheat?

Or is it a field of dreams?

Where none of the realities of today’s unforgiving world matter

Where the smell of the sweet breeze wipe away the smell of gun powder, the decay of dead bodies, the stench of greed.

Is it a place where the rays of the sun feel like beams of hope?

Hope for a better today where we are not so concerned with meaningless material possession, titles, and positions.

I look into this field and I almost believe

Believe that we can learn and appreciate the lessons nature tries to each

That we are one, divided not by race, class, nation, our own prejudices

That what you put into life and really living is what you get out of it

That we realize that protecting mother earth is the only way to continue this life and the journey beyond.

Sigh…….

This field can almost make me believe                

But reality awaits, cruel and unmerciful;

Like the hands that will ultimately harvest this land

But at this moment

None of it matters

I dream and feel the naïve hope

That maybe one day it will be as I see it.

A world where dreams grow and bloom and produce succulent fruits of hope

While seeds germinate into trees of peace.